Demented family member: what impact does it have on a family’s life?

The care of a family member suffering from dementia poses a serious challenge for the family, as the disease affects not only the patient but also the relatives providing care. Dementia gradually impacts memory, thinking, and daily activities, which can lead to dramatic changes in the behavior and personality of those affected. During caregiving, family members must contend not only with the health needs of the patient but also with their own emotional and psychological burdens.

The prevalence of dementia is continuously increasing, with one of the main reasons being the aging population. Various forms of the disease, such as Alzheimer’s disease and vascular dementia, affect numerous people worldwide. The burdens of caring for dementia patients fall particularly on women, as research shows that the majority of caregivers are women, often the children of the families, especially daughters.

Who cares for dementia patients?

Caring for dementia patients generally falls to family members, primarily direct relatives. The most common scenario is when children, especially daughters, take on the care of their parents. Spouses also play a significant role in caregiving, while other relatives, such as siblings, grandchildren, or friends, participate less frequently in the process.

It is interesting to note that most family members who take on the care of dementia patients are middle-aged, often between 45 and 74 years old. This trend is related to the aging population and late parenthood. Middle-aged caregivers often have to care not only for their elderly, demented parent but also for their own children, which can create particularly burdensome situations. Moreover, the physical and emotional burdens associated with caring for dementia patients can cause significant stress for caregivers.

Care from the children’s perspective

When children take on the care of a parent struggling with dementia, they often find themselves in a difficult emotional situation. It can be extremely challenging for them to confront the fact that the parent they once looked up to is gradually losing their independence and memory. The roles of the children are reversed, and many feel that they are now in the parental role, which can be emotionally taxing.

At the same time, caregiving also provides an opportunity for children to reconnect with their parents and develop a different, deeper emotional bond. Caring for a demented parent not only comes with difficulties but also allows for the redefinition of relationships and mutual support. During caregiving, children can learn to give back the care they once received from their parents.

The role of spouses in caregiving

The dynamics of spousal relationships also change significantly with the onset of dementia. The equality and mutual support that once characterized the relationship can be disrupted, as one partner becomes increasingly dependent. The healthy spouse often finds themselves feeling alone, which can lead to mental and emotional isolation. The decrease in communication and the loss of intimacy create further difficulties in the relationship.

Although the spousal relationship is burdened with challenges due to dementia, there is still the possibility of mutual connection. Shared moments, such as recalling a common memory or sharing a smile, can mean a lot to both parties. These moments can help maintain the relationship and provide opportunities to express love, even if the demented partner does not recognize us.

Effects on children and grandchildren

Children and grandchildren living in the same household as family members with dementia may also be emotionally affected. Young children sense the changes occurring in their environment, so it is important for parents to talk openly about the situation. Age-appropriate explanations can help children understand that dementia is not their fault and that they do not need to fear becoming ill themselves.

For older children, open communication can be beneficial, as they often react with feelings of shame or anger towards the behavior of the dementia-affected family member. Children who grow up with a family member with dementia often become more sensitive to social situations and may develop greater empathy towards others. Involving them in caregiving can help them learn responsibility, but it is important to emphasize that caring for dementia patients is not their responsibility.

It is important to pay attention to oneself as well

Caring for dementia patients can present many challenges, and the mental and physical health of caregivers can easily be jeopardized. Feelings of depression, anxiety, and social isolation are common among caregivers, making it essential for them to pay attention to their own well-being. If they notice any negative symptoms, they should not hesitate to seek help.

Fortunately, there are now numerous support groups available where caregivers can share their experiences with others in similar situations. Additionally, regular screenings and maintaining activities outside of caregiving can help caregivers preserve their physical and mental health, which is in the best interest of both the caregiver and the patient.