When can we consider relationship and codependency a problem?

The phenomenon of relationship dependency has increasingly become the focus of attention in recent decades. This dependency not only signifies a deep emotional attachment to another person but rather an excessive and unreasonable clinginess. A relationship-dependent individual tends to define themselves as part of the relationship, thereby losing their independent identity. This phenomenon can lead to various problems, including domestic violence, conflicts with family members, and distortions in parent-child relationships.

Relationship dependency is often associated with personality traits such as manipulativeness, self-sacrifice, and a desire to possess the other person. The dependent individual often distances themselves from friends and hobbies, creating a vacuum around them. Family members also suffer from the tension that arises from the behavior of the relationship-dependent person, and children often become tools in the parents’ conflicts.

Relationship Dependency and Its Characteristics

Relationship dependency can manifest in various forms, and the behavior of the dependent person is often fluctuating. They can be both manipulative and self-sacrificing, trying to maintain the relationship at all costs. Such individuals often suppress their emotions, which later surface in the form of accusations. Those affected frequently fail to understand that their relationship is unhealthy, projecting their faults onto their partner.

Relationship-dependent individuals base their self-esteem on the opinions of the other person, generating tension and emotions within the relationship. Since they cannot meet their emotional needs in other ways, they expect their partner to continuously provide them with comfort and support. This dynamic often leads to the erosion of friendships and family relationships, as the dependent person neglects the outside world and their previous hobbies.

Relationship dependency is not just an issue for adults; children can also be victims. They are often drawn into conflicts between parents, which can severely affect their development and emotional state. Children can easily become pawns in their parents’ battles, further exacerbating family tension.

Relationship Dependency and Anxiety Problems

Relationship dependency is closely intertwined with anxiety disorders. Those affected often suffer from a fear of losing relationships, which is rooted in childhood experiences. These experiences can create a form of emotional deficiency that manifests in adulthood and causes problems in adult relationships.

Anxiety is often accompanied by other psychological issues, such as panic disorders, phobias, or obsessive-compulsive disorders. Relationship-dependent individuals tend to suppress their emotions, which can later lead to tension and outbursts. Establishing emotional stability is essential for personality development and the formation of secure relationships.

Experiences from childhood are crucial. The first few years represent a critical period during which a child forms a symbiotic relationship with their mother. If this process is disrupted, emotional development can become distorted, and clinginess may appear in adult relationships.

Recognizing relationship dependency alone is not enough for change. Those affected often find themselves struggling between extreme emotions and impulses without knowing how to escape the situation. The key to resolution lies in personality development, where they may be able to fill the gaps and establish a stable, independent self-image.

Treatment and Prevention of Relationship Dependency

Treating relationship dependency is a complex process that often requires psychological assistance. Under the guidance of a therapist, whether in individual or couple/family therapy, those affected can understand their problems and find solutions. During therapy, it is important for dependent individuals to learn how to establish healthy relationships based on mutual respect and support.

From a prevention standpoint, emotional security gained in childhood is essential. Parents and educators play a crucial role in helping children develop healthy self-esteem and emotional intelligence. Establishing secure relationships, respecting boundaries, and fostering independence can all contribute to ensuring that future generations avoid relationship dependency.

Relationship dependency is not just an individual problem but a societal phenomenon that requires awareness and support at the community level for effective management. Those affected should be given the opportunity to seek help and work on solving their problems in a supportive environment. Building healthy relationships is an attainable goal for everyone, which requires the right tools and support.